I’m not the girl you want me to be

I feel like I need a warning label. Not the kind that’s visible to the public, but maybe something tattooed across my hip or my breast – the kind only a lover can see.

I’m not the girl you want me to be.

To my sweet amazing wonderful supportive dependable reliable comfortable comforting almost-husband ex-boyfriend: I can’t be the girl who settles for vanilla. I can’t be content with three sex positions and no spice. I can’t be held down unless you fight me for it. Scratch, bite, claw, dominate me into a position where you can tie me down with a rope and a ring. I can’t go down quietly with no fight.

I’m not the girl you want me to be.

To my one that got away, the one I will never stop dreaming about it night, the one who will forever set the standard for desire and passion, the one who introduced me to the dark side: I can’t be the girl who is so chill, so cool, that you can ignore her for days, weeks at a time. I can’t be the blow-up doll you stuff in your closet when I get inconvenient. I can’t be the perfect body, or the perfect mindreader who knows exactly what you want when you want it. I can’t shed my insecurities and my anxieties so that you can play your games, only to get nothing in return.

I’m not the girl you want me to be.

To all the internet strangers who assume they know everything they need to know about me before the first conversation: I can’t be the playmate you’re looking for. I have issues, mental health failings, and emotional baggage that you can’t see in my profile picture or on my list of fetishes. I’m not here for your entertainment or your pleasure. I’m here to learn about myself, not get you off.

I’m not the girl you want be to be.

To my friends, family, and other social groups: I can’t be the honest girl that I claim to be your face. I can’t spoil your simple lovely vanilla perception of me with the darkness inside me. While you scratch your heads and wonder why I don’t have a ring on my finger, I think about the font of my warning label, the size, the placement.

Danger; hazard; turn away now. Madness lies this way.

I want to ruin my vanilla love with my darkness until he can tie me down comfortably.

I’m not the girl

I want to rage at my lover and throw my heart at his feet so he understands the consequences of what he has created.

you want

I want to turn away every advance with a scathing retort to deflate an obviously oversized ego.

me to be.

Danger; hazard; turn away now. Madness lies this way.

I’m not the girl you want me to be.


Brugge Belgium, Ghent Belgium, Brussels Belgium, Mons Belgium, Charloi Belgium, Antwerp Belgium, Bastogne, Amsterdam Netherlands, Rotterdam Netherlands, Eindhoven Netherlands, Arnhem Netherlands, Utrecht Netherlands, Amersfoort Netherlands, Apeldoorn Netherlands, Zwolle Netherlands, Deventer Netherlands, Enschede Netherlands, Groningen Netherlands, Emmen Netherlands, Leeywarden Netherlands, Luxembourg

Acton England, Banstead England, Bedfont England, borehamwood England, Burgess Hill England, catford England, claygate England, Cobham England, cobham England, Coulsdon England, Datford England, Dorking England, East Grinstead England, east ham England, Edenbridge England, edgware England, enfield England, fareham England, Hammersmith England, hendon England, Hillingdon England, Horley England, hornchurch England, Leigh England, littlehampton England

Longfield England, loughton England, Maidenhead England, mickleham England, Orpington England, osidge England, Oxted England, Paddock Wood England, Redhill England, Richmond England, seaford England, sidcup England, south ockendon England, Staines-upon-Thames England, Steyning England, Sutton England, Swanley England, Teddington England, tottenham England, Uckfield England, Walingham England, West Malling England, Westerham England, Weybridge England, Windsor England, Woking England, Woodmancote England

Obedience Training, Objectification, Old Guard Slavery, older women, Online Play, Oral Sex, ordered to masturbate, Orgasm Control, Orgasm Denial, Orgy, otk spanking, outdoor bondage, Outdoor sex, Paddling, Pain, Panties, Panty-Sniffing, Pantyhose/Stockings, pegging, Percussion Play, Petplay, Petticoats, phone sex, Photography, Piercings, Piggy Play, pigtails, Pin-Ups, Pinching, Pirates, Play Piercing, Play Punishment, polyamory, Pony Play, Porn, Posture Collars, Power Exchange

Predator/prey, Predicament Bondage, Pressure points, pro domme, Prostate Massage, prostate milking, Protocol, Psycholagny, Public Humiliation, public play, punching, Puppy Play, Pursuit, Take-Down & Capture, pussy pumping, pussy worship, Sacred Sexuality, Sadism, Sadomasochism, sapiosexuality, Saran Wrap, Satin, Scarf bondage, Scarification, Scent, schoolgirl, schoolgirl uniform, Scratching, Seduction, Self-bondage, Sensation Play, Sensory Deprivation, sensual domination, sensual play

Sensual/slave dances, sensualism, Service, Service-oriented submission, sex, Sex During Menstruation, Sex In Public, sex in the cemetery, sex in videostore porn rooms, sex magick, Sex Online, sex with strangers, sexual objectification, sexual slavery, Shackles, shaving, Shibari, Single Tail Whips, Slapping, Slave Bells, slave tattoos, slavery, sleep, sleepsacks, sleepy sex, sluts, small tits, smothering, snuggling, Spandex, Spanking, speculums, Speech restriction, spiritual bdsm, Spitting, Spreader Bars, Squirting, staples, Stockings, Strap-ons, submission, subspace, superheroes, suspension, Suspension Bondage, Swallowing, Switching, sybian



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